I HATE YOU

I see you as a friend now. I know that's all you'll ever be. I know it will never go any further again. but

SOMETIMES I HATE YOU!!!!

(but i still love you)

I don't mean to. I hate the fact you don't know how i still feel about you. You don't realise that it breaks my heart when you tell me what 'she' wants to do with you. 'She's' not bad or anything but i know 'she' suits you better than i ever would. That's what kills me inside.

But sometimes (just sometimes), i like it that you tell me these things. It means you trust me. Then i still feel close to you. And i know that she doesn't like us talking. And i like how you complain about her to me.

Does that make me a bad person?

I just wish that you don't do what 'she' wants if you don't want it (and it sounds like you don't).

Please do what keeps you happy.

Please don't think i'm a bad person.

I hope you tell me more next time i see you. That way there's still something between us. 'She' wont like that.

...

I'm just about ready to give up.




I hate feeling like this.




Why is my smile so believable.

It's all started again and i don't know what to do.